Saturday 29 December 2007
Another week
**Again so it does not bring you down the shit these sub missives put me through this blog has been removed but with a word of caution, I maybe a Dominant bitch in more then 1 way that does not give you the right to play with my heart and and treat me like a fool, only to crush my feelings and heart like a bug, being a Dominant does not mean I do not have feelings**
Tuesday 25 December 2007
T'is the season
T'is the season to be jolly fa-lalala la la la la.
pff fuck that!
It is the season to make a fool of yourself and to sit back and wonder when there hell the last year has gone! My last year has been flushed down the toilet and it is time to get the next year in order! Yes this next year I am going to sit down and write a plan and stick to it! On the list is going to be only things I can control.
There are twelve months in a year and I am going to have things on the list that I can work on over the year but by the end of two thousand and eight I would have finished them all!
So here is the list.
1.Lose the rest of my weight and run the marathon in September
2. Get a nine til five job with no stress even if it is in a supermarket
2a, or hire someone to do most of my work, even better retire.
3. Get pregnant! (this may just be a solution also to number two be a stay at home mother)
4. Have a vacation I have not had one for over ten years, maybe to see my family as it has been well over ten years since I seen them
5. Buy a new house or apartment
6. Renovate the rest of my house
7. Make as many people as I can happy and fulfill some dreams of friends
8. At least double my stiletto collection it has to be between the one and two hundred by the end of two thousand and eight
9. Write a list of at least one hundred things to do before I die and start doing it.
10. Spend more time on my hobbies to sell for people in need
11. Remember myself and that sometimes I have to be selfish for self preservation
12. Get out more to the theater, concerts and parties.
This is the list, maybe I change it over the next few weeks though I am thinking I better start at number twelve and work my way up as many of the things will be some what hard if I am pregnant, lets see how this cookie crumbles!
pff fuck that!
It is the season to make a fool of yourself and to sit back and wonder when there hell the last year has gone! My last year has been flushed down the toilet and it is time to get the next year in order! Yes this next year I am going to sit down and write a plan and stick to it! On the list is going to be only things I can control.
There are twelve months in a year and I am going to have things on the list that I can work on over the year but by the end of two thousand and eight I would have finished them all!
So here is the list.
1.Lose the rest of my weight and run the marathon in September
2. Get a nine til five job with no stress even if it is in a supermarket
2a, or hire someone to do most of my work, even better retire.
3. Get pregnant! (this may just be a solution also to number two be a stay at home mother)
4. Have a vacation I have not had one for over ten years, maybe to see my family as it has been well over ten years since I seen them
5. Buy a new house or apartment
6. Renovate the rest of my house
7. Make as many people as I can happy and fulfill some dreams of friends
8. At least double my stiletto collection it has to be between the one and two hundred by the end of two thousand and eight
9. Write a list of at least one hundred things to do before I die and start doing it.
10. Spend more time on my hobbies to sell for people in need
11. Remember myself and that sometimes I have to be selfish for self preservation
12. Get out more to the theater, concerts and parties.
This is the list, maybe I change it over the next few weeks though I am thinking I better start at number twelve and work my way up as many of the things will be some what hard if I am pregnant, lets see how this cookie crumbles!
A man and his bills
**Due what I have written on this post and the emotions it brings up in my I have taken it offline**
Sunday 23 December 2007
Really?
Here I am Sunday morning trying to get some paperwork done before a dinner party tonight and out of the blue I get a message on my MSN "Oh I want to see your tits, I am jerking off just thinking about them" Needless to say I messaged them back to say "piss off."
This person I had known for some time and never have they been so rude or have we even talked about anything along the lines of sex!
"Oh let me see your tits"
"Oh I am so horny"
"Tell me the last time you fingered yourself"
Usually I would welcome any chat to distract me from work, this chat was just not one of them, he was trying to make a date to "see me." In all its boredom and him not understanding the word "no" or "piss off" I made the comment "Well there is no use telling you to go fuck yourself as you obviously are" then the block and delete button come to my rescue.
I am awarm hot blooded woman but please chat me up and flatter me all other methods are useless and feeble and as we all know the truth is that nothing will happen unless we want it to, we being the female!!!!
This person I had known for some time and never have they been so rude or have we even talked about anything along the lines of sex!
"Oh let me see your tits"
"Oh I am so horny"
"Tell me the last time you fingered yourself"
Usually I would welcome any chat to distract me from work, this chat was just not one of them, he was trying to make a date to "see me." In all its boredom and him not understanding the word "no" or "piss off" I made the comment "Well there is no use telling you to go fuck yourself as you obviously are" then the block and delete button come to my rescue.
I am a
Saturday 22 December 2007
heros and sluts
I have been thinking lately over a comment made a few days ago by a male over a business lunch, it was along the lines of how he was seeing a lady but he called her a slut because she was sleeping with more then one male, yet he is married and also has two mistress's and the other men at the lunch called him a hero a stud.
They turned to me, being the only female at the table and asked me on my thoughts, seeing one of the people at the table was also the gentleman asking why I owned such a compact car and I said I did not have to prove my penis size I answered with a grin on my face.
" I am a hero, a stud as I do not fit into the vision of this male dominated culture who by the way are/is very insecure for in your hearts you know females are superior then you and you try to limit us females by creating a social disapproval, so back to you slut, how is it with your two hero's you sleep without outside your marriage?"
Ahh there was silence at the table then the subject moved onto the weather for sometime until one brave soul asked me "Veiled, how much of a hero are you?" It was a dinner of eye opening conversation.
Why you males have to call a female a slut because she may sleep with more then one male I do not know, is it because she is not wanting you also ? I think it is a perverted way of men to have emotional superiority over a woman.
I have had my nights/days or passion and yes also sex with more then one person, I am not a slut, I just know what I want and need.
They turned to me, being the only female at the table and asked me on my thoughts, seeing one of the people at the table was also the gentleman asking why I owned such a compact car and I said I did not have to prove my penis size I answered with a grin on my face.
" I am a hero, a stud as I do not fit into the vision of this male dominated culture who by the way are/is very insecure for in your hearts you know females are superior then you and you try to limit us females by creating a social disapproval, so back to you slut, how is it with your two hero's you sleep without outside your marriage?"
Ahh there was silence at the table then the subject moved onto the weather for sometime until one brave soul asked me "Veiled, how much of a hero are you?" It was a dinner of eye opening conversation.
Why you males have to call a female a slut because she may sleep with more then one male I do not know, is it because she is not wanting you also ? I think it is a perverted way of men to have emotional superiority over a woman.
I have had my nights/days or passion and yes also sex with more then one person, I am not a slut, I just know what I want and need.
Wednesday 19 December 2007
Picking up the pieces
As you have seen lately I have not been keeping up with my blog. Many joyful things have taken my attention and my mind was on cloud nine. My emotions were so high that I thought there was no way down. I now stand corrected. I have written blogs in the past that have come from the heat of the moment...when I'm pissed off, upset or when I'm in love or "think" I am in love. All have been without thought and this blog is no exception.
It has taken me years to build up a wall around my emotions to protect myself and my heart. I vowed that I would never again put myself in a situation where I would or could get hurt and have my emotions trampled upon. That was until I met someone recently. I took a risk. I fell in love.
Like a fast moving train we did not have any breaks, running free and wild and being teenagers again. The conversations we had made our hearts skip beats, the feeling of being complete was amazing. The fortress I built up around myself slowly crumbled down, it had fallen down around me even without me knowing and I felt so free the safety I got when he wrapped his arms around me was amazing, the only sound was his heartbeat, the birds stopped singing, and the wind stopped blowing; it was total bliss. Our plans of the future would bring a smile to anyone face, things we said we would never do (like marriage) that changed, it felt so right with him and he said the same ~drifts of day dreaming~ so perfect, trains both on the same track, guess it was then when he hit the wall.
I let my defenses down and now this! I am picking up pieces of a broken heart. Why you ask? What happened? I have no clue and if I knew I could deal with it I would put closure to it. That is what us females do and what we need.
No words in days then an e-mail, saying how he knows he has hurt me and that I made him see sides of him that he never knew he had. That I "let" him fall in love with me. I showed him feelings he never knew existed. Now you would think that is all good, correct? ~drum roll~ there is always a BUT and here it is. He can never give me what I crave. ( I do not know what I crave, only him hmm) that he cannot be there when I need him most as his job makes him travel a lot. He said that I deserve to have a man who is more with me than away from me. To have someone home longer than packing packing and unpacking suitcases. Finishing the email he says "you really do not know how much I love you. I have never met someone like you and if the time and place were different...But thinking of you alone, missing, hurting maybe will be a bit too much to bear.
I read the email, I did not cry, I did not laugh, I did nothing, I was in shock, I have no clue what happened I just, I just, I just do not know, I mean, I, it, we, I, I do not know.
I started getting a little mad, I talked to my two closest friends who know everything about me, I could not believe after all the talking, and communication and openness we had. I got the email I did it is not registering in my head and I am not a stupid female!
In the beginning I knew his work, he traveled a lot, I do too sometimes. God did I come across needy? Well if so, he is wrong, I have so much love I want to give and it seems I am to bottle it up again and there is no way I will let that wall down again.
Only two people who know who I am read this and also the person this post is about, truth is I do not want to let go of him. Yes you. I want you. You have not changed since I met you. Your job is the same, your heart is the same, your smile, your affection, your words still go straight to my heart, so why?
I could not put my feelings into words but one of my friends could, I had this email ready to send but I just could not send it though it says most things I wanted to say so here it is.
Dear ....
Thank you for making my decisions for me. While I appreciate your efforts, I do not need any man deciding what is best for me and my life.
I am a grown woman and I am more than capable in deciding what I want and need from a relationship. Who is to say that I want a relationship where I have a man 7 days a week and 24 hours a day?
However, as I stated, I do appreciate your taking the time to call the shots for me, however it will not be necessary in the future. I wish you all the success and luck in the world in finding who and what you want out of life.
Sincerely,
A woman completely able to decide her own life's choices!
I know that I don't have everything precisely planned out in my life. No one does. My life may not run as a smooth oiled machine at this point in time but I have it under control. I am taking my life in the directions that I want. I am making changes in who I am and who I want to be. I am strong, independent, and successful and I am learning to love me and all that I have to offer this world. I am more than just my emotions and I am more than just the words written on this page. The day will come when someone will see that and jump at the chance to experience all that I have to offer. One man's loss is most definitely another man's gain!
I am ME and nothing will ever change that.
Saturday 15 December 2007
Lord help you
The male species never stops amazing me with their total stupidity, Ok there are a few exceptions to the rules.
I was dressed in a nice casual way, jeans a nice blouse and my stilettos (goes without saying) I went to pick up a lovely young lady of eight years old and she dragged me to a Christmas market of her local school. It is a small village and very religious, So religious that when I walk near any water there it starts boiling as I think they have only holy water running through the village.
Getting dragged by the child through all the crafts they had made I forked out money to buy most of the things she made and also things she wanted to buy, people looking down their nose at me, I think it is the stilettos they seem to me a sign of being a slut, sure it is written in the bible that way.
I watch the children play as I sipped on a glass of warm chocolate milk every now and then I had to smell under my arms to see if that was the reason people kept their distance, I had many looks, you know the look, the "I'm-not-looking-at-you-obvious-look" in such a small village everyone knows everyone and I was a new face and I promise you it will not be the last time they see me!
I stayed with child for at least an hour and was introduced to just about everyone she was so proud of me and happy I was there. Playing tag with the children in stilettos was a new experience but it was a lot of fun, then playing statues, oh the things I do for children, I just wait to have three or four of my own. When I was finished playing I informed the young lady we were going to leave in five minutes, all of a sudden it was like moths to light, the fathers went to the group of children, I thought it was so sweet that the fathers were going to play as well and not be like sticks in the mud huddling around the open fire because it was below zero I was totally wrong.
On leaving the young lady I was with looked at me and giggles I asked her what was so funny and she handed me a whole handful of papers " These are for you" I opened them and I could not believe my eyes, phone numbers and not just one, the young lady I was with said to me while looking at me with her deep innocent eyes, " Are you allowed to date and marry more then one person?" I informed her no and she continued to tell me that all the fathers that gave her the numbers live together with the mother of her friends, in other words married and under one roof.
In this small village this Sunday I think there is going to be a lot of hail Mary's said and I am wondering what to do with these numbers, it crossed my mind to go to the next market at the school and personally hand their phone numbers back I just "pray" their wives are not close by.
Ok I was flattered but to stop being a spineless species and do not involve a child, you want to break your marriage vowels you said "in front of the lord" do not involve an innocent child in the equation by giving the letters and phone Numbers to them.
I was dressed in a nice casual way, jeans a nice blouse and my stilettos (goes without saying) I went to pick up a lovely young lady of eight years old and she dragged me to a Christmas market of her local school. It is a small village and very religious, So religious that when I walk near any water there it starts boiling as I think they have only holy water running through the village.
Getting dragged by the child through all the crafts they had made I forked out money to buy most of the things she made and also things she wanted to buy, people looking down their nose at me, I think it is the stilettos they seem to me a sign of being a slut, sure it is written in the bible that way.
I watch the children play as I sipped on a glass of warm chocolate milk every now and then I had to smell under my arms to see if that was the reason people kept their distance, I had many looks, you know the look, the "I'm-not-looking-at-you-obvious-look" in such a small village everyone knows everyone and I was a new face and I promise you it will not be the last time they see me!
I stayed with child for at least an hour and was introduced to just about everyone she was so proud of me and happy I was there. Playing tag with the children in stilettos was a new experience but it was a lot of fun, then playing statues, oh the things I do for children, I just wait to have three or four of my own. When I was finished playing I informed the young lady we were going to leave in five minutes, all of a sudden it was like moths to light, the fathers went to the group of children, I thought it was so sweet that the fathers were going to play as well and not be like sticks in the mud huddling around the open fire because it was below zero I was totally wrong.
On leaving the young lady I was with looked at me and giggles I asked her what was so funny and she handed me a whole handful of papers " These are for you" I opened them and I could not believe my eyes, phone numbers and not just one, the young lady I was with said to me while looking at me with her deep innocent eyes, " Are you allowed to date and marry more then one person?" I informed her no and she continued to tell me that all the fathers that gave her the numbers live together with the mother of her friends, in other words married and under one roof.
In this small village this Sunday I think there is going to be a lot of hail Mary's said and I am wondering what to do with these numbers, it crossed my mind to go to the next market at the school and personally hand their phone numbers back I just "pray" their wives are not close by.
Ok I was flattered but to stop being a spineless species and do not involve a child, you want to break your marriage vowels you said "in front of the lord" do not involve an innocent child in the equation by giving the letters and phone Numbers to them.
Wednesday 12 December 2007
D Day update
It seems a month since I last posted things have been so busy so you can just imagine the updates I have got for you over the next few days/weeks.
I thought it would be best to get the D Day update out of the way. As most readers know there has been so slight issues with BD, One he is a pompas arse and Two, he is a pompas arse As said in an earlier post we had a date, that date was last night and it was very entertaining.
Seven in the evening by his house to get him then a drive into the city, on the way to the venue there was a comment made of there my smile and fun feeling flew out the window, I am unsure of the comment I know it pissed me off and I let BD know it was not appreciated, four lanes of traffic we were travelling in the second lane and I come to a screeching stop, do not piss me off if I am the driver, he tried to cover up the comment to make a joke of it, I drove on after some time and when in the city he started again, talk about know how to piss of a hormonal female!
A short walk to the venue things changed somewhat, all of a sudden I was getting attention, We went to a concert everyone dressed in ripped jeans and t-shirts with their gym shoes, I do not own any old jeans and the t-shirts I do have I wear to the gym with gym shoes but there is no way I will be seen in that kind of clothing in a public place outside of the gym let alone a concert!
The band come on stage my heart raced having a drink in my hand I was unable to clap so finger in the mouth to whistle, yes this lady can whistle, dancing in my little space at the front of the stage, stilettos, NICE jeans, a lovely top, a thin scarf, I stood out somewhat and got attention when BD noticed it he turned in the dog he is and had to piss on his territory, A lovely gentleman come up to dance with me but he was shoo shooed away.
I enjoyed the band I danced and rocked all night and the attention was welcomed but above all the best thing of the night was knowing BD wanted me and I slammed the door in his face. I told him about BB and how we are dating (update on next post) yet BD still tried to kiss me when I dropped him off home.
~grins~ I left out all the good details all for good reason, next time if you return you shall find it out.
I thought it would be best to get the D Day update out of the way. As most readers know there has been so slight issues with BD, One he is a pompas arse and Two, he is a pompas arse As said in an earlier post we had a date, that date was last night and it was very entertaining.
Seven in the evening by his house to get him then a drive into the city, on the way to the venue there was a comment made of there my smile and fun feeling flew out the window, I am unsure of the comment I know it pissed me off and I let BD know it was not appreciated, four lanes of traffic we were travelling in the second lane and I come to a screeching stop, do not piss me off if I am the driver, he tried to cover up the comment to make a joke of it, I drove on after some time and when in the city he started again, talk about know how to piss of a hormonal female!
A short walk to the venue things changed somewhat, all of a sudden I was getting attention, We went to a concert everyone dressed in ripped jeans and t-shirts with their gym shoes, I do not own any old jeans and the t-shirts I do have I wear to the gym with gym shoes but there is no way I will be seen in that kind of clothing in a public place outside of the gym let alone a concert!
The band come on stage my heart raced having a drink in my hand I was unable to clap so finger in the mouth to whistle, yes this lady can whistle, dancing in my little space at the front of the stage, stilettos, NICE jeans, a lovely top, a thin scarf, I stood out somewhat and got attention when BD noticed it he turned in the dog he is and had to piss on his territory, A lovely gentleman come up to dance with me but he was shoo shooed away.
I enjoyed the band I danced and rocked all night and the attention was welcomed but above all the best thing of the night was knowing BD wanted me and I slammed the door in his face. I told him about BB and how we are dating (update on next post) yet BD still tried to kiss me when I dropped him off home.
~grins~ I left out all the good details all for good reason, next time if you return you shall find it out.
Wednesday 5 December 2007
Help needed!
Recently I do not know if I have been busy or just not interested in "things." All my times has been is work, stressing and the gym to get the stress out, I have not even had the mindset to flirt, to mess up some minds which is really not like me. If I look deep down I know the reason why, actually it is not even deep down it is right here! sitting on top of my heart and I shall share it with you.
A good friend of mine, also a female working in a mans world. I have businessmen to deal with, she has scientist and professors to deal with, at least if needed I can walk all over the males I know, I can only imagine what she has to get through to control them, though being very feminine females we do have our ways!
Last week my friend was away for the week in a conference, dealing with the long days, the drinks and the males, I was free a lot of the week sitting at home pining over someone and it seems she was also. You see my friend and I have pretty much given up on finding "the one" who makes our hearts skip a beat, who make us feel like the princess's we are. We have our little "side kicks" though nothing concrete as it means we might have to let down our defensive walls and trust people, both being hurt before we are not planning on doing that journey anytime soon.
My days were filled with my heart having an irregular beat, my thoughts all up in the air unable to think straight, it was a lucky thing I didn't have to work, I even checked my email so often, not that it made email turn up any faster. This is why, BB, that is who it is all about BB, he was away in Paris, the city of love and he did not know he had my love, he did not know he has this affect on me, why didn't I tell him? why didn't I come up with an excuse to go also? Good heavens what is happening to me ?
I think it is something in the air, during the meetings my friend was in she had times to message me and she has also lost her head, it seems Mr P has given her the bug as well, she can not focus she is pulling her lovely hair out! we both are.
The advantage I have over my friend is that I have spent a lovely, relaxing afternoon with BB and she has not had that chance with Mr P at the moment.
Now I get to let out a few things. BB it just amazing, he makes me lose my head, I can not get him out of my head, he is a gentleman, within the few hours we were together I felt so amazing he put me at ease yet lifted me on a pedestal, I have never felt so complete, he makes me feel like a giggling little school girl and to put the cherry on top he wears a suit most times and is a great kisser!
I have really lost myself and I am finding it so hard to keep my defenses up, I am slowly letting the drawbridge down and that is all new to me and I do not know what I am meant to do now, how am I meant to act? how do I keep protecting myself if I am letting someone slowly chip away at the brick wall? I am a giver, a care taker but I never let anyone get to close not ever.
I guess I need to sit back and try to relax as much as I can, maybe it is time I made it to the gym everyday to get all this frustration out that BB is not in my arms everyday, goodness me I even "half" joked at marriage today and he did also! this is crazy, insane I have lost my head! totally lost my head! As my friend said "We have lost the only braincell that worked and rationalized things" we are both in the same boat going up the same river we just hope there is no waterfall ahead that we fall down!
A good friend of mine, also a female working in a mans world. I have businessmen to deal with, she has scientist and professors to deal with, at least if needed I can walk all over the males I know, I can only imagine what she has to get through to control them, though being very feminine females we do have our ways!
Last week my friend was away for the week in a conference, dealing with the long days, the drinks and the males, I was free a lot of the week sitting at home pining over someone and it seems she was also. You see my friend and I have pretty much given up on finding "the one" who makes our hearts skip a beat, who make us feel like the princess's we are. We have our little "side kicks" though nothing concrete as it means we might have to let down our defensive walls and trust people, both being hurt before we are not planning on doing that journey anytime soon.
My days were filled with my heart having an irregular beat, my thoughts all up in the air unable to think straight, it was a lucky thing I didn't have to work, I even checked my email so often, not that it made email turn up any faster. This is why, BB, that is who it is all about BB, he was away in Paris, the city of love and he did not know he had my love, he did not know he has this affect on me, why didn't I tell him? why didn't I come up with an excuse to go also? Good heavens what is happening to me ?
I think it is something in the air, during the meetings my friend was in she had times to message me and she has also lost her head, it seems Mr P has given her the bug as well, she can not focus she is pulling her lovely hair out! we both are.
The advantage I have over my friend is that I have spent a lovely, relaxing afternoon with BB and she has not had that chance with Mr P at the moment.
Now I get to let out a few things. BB it just amazing, he makes me lose my head, I can not get him out of my head, he is a gentleman, within the few hours we were together I felt so amazing he put me at ease yet lifted me on a pedestal, I have never felt so complete, he makes me feel like a giggling little school girl and to put the cherry on top he wears a suit most times and is a great kisser!
I have really lost myself and I am finding it so hard to keep my defenses up, I am slowly letting the drawbridge down and that is all new to me and I do not know what I am meant to do now, how am I meant to act? how do I keep protecting myself if I am letting someone slowly chip away at the brick wall? I am a giver, a care taker but I never let anyone get to close not ever.
I guess I need to sit back and try to relax as much as I can, maybe it is time I made it to the gym everyday to get all this frustration out that BB is not in my arms everyday, goodness me I even "half" joked at marriage today and he did also! this is crazy, insane I have lost my head! totally lost my head! As my friend said "We have lost the only braincell that worked and rationalized things" we are both in the same boat going up the same river we just hope there is no waterfall ahead that we fall down!
Sunday 2 December 2007
Clarity
The last five days have been very busy not only with work but with things in my head also. We all know now about BD and the carrot that has been dangled in front of me on some occasions, being blind I reached for it, now things have become so very crystal clear and there will not be a relapse.
It is funny how you can get caught up on things and see things that are really not there, as a wise person once said to me, There are three sides to a story, yours, theirs and the truth. I found the middle ground, I found the truth, It is eye opening and reality gripping, makes you sit back and think what reality was I in at the time?
Back here in the real world where I belong, where I have control over the things controllable I realized that daydreaming and wishful thinking is not for me. I need to step back and not see things from only my point of view, I need to stand outside, Yes I need to stand on the outside looking in, taking a look at the big picture and not the sections that appeal to me as it can be dangerous and blinding, delusional even.
Sometimes you can not see that any amount of work will not to get you through the door, totally oblivious, irrational thoughts, mindless moments, reckless reactions feelings the illusion of lust, the impression of passion then the reflection it was all insanity, make believe, one sided.
Seeing things clear-cut, not in a haze, things being clarified, many things, everything.
Lets boil this down apprehensible truths.
It is funny how you can get caught up on things and see things that are really not there, as a wise person once said to me, There are three sides to a story, yours, theirs and the truth. I found the middle ground, I found the truth, It is eye opening and reality gripping, makes you sit back and think what reality was I in at the time?
Back here in the real world where I belong, where I have control over the things controllable I realized that daydreaming and wishful thinking is not for me. I need to step back and not see things from only my point of view, I need to stand outside, Yes I need to stand on the outside looking in, taking a look at the big picture and not the sections that appeal to me as it can be dangerous and blinding, delusional even.
Sometimes you can not see that any amount of work will not to get you through the door, totally oblivious, irrational thoughts, mindless moments, reckless reactions feelings the illusion of lust, the impression of passion then the reflection it was all insanity, make believe, one sided.
Seeing things clear-cut, not in a haze, things being clarified, many things, everything.
Lets boil this down apprehensible truths.
Tuesday 27 November 2007
Not so out of reach.
How funny is life? It amuses me greatly it is the best entertainment around, More so if you know what direct your life is going and the people around you are like chickens with their heads cut off.
After my last post of BD being out of reach many things in a short amount of time chanced, Within 24 hours we had decided to go out on a date, the only time both of our agendas are free is early December. He again confessed his love his deepest feelings and desires towards me.
In this short change of things I have also found out he is an arrogant person which has made me a little upset, BD has taken credit for things that has had nothing to do with him. If it is one thing that really gets on my nerve it is people taking credit for others work, just because they are attention seekers and want a pat on the back for a job well done but to lazy to actually do the work! Needless to say I want to impregnate my stiletto up his anal canal.
My plan is to sit back and watch how things develop, see what steps he takes next. You see I am a person who can just wipe someone from my life without a second thought no matter who they are or how much I love them, For example my own mother, 13 years ago I wiped her from my life and I have no problems with it at all. I give people the benefit of the doubt but if one abuses trust over and over again it is "game over" and there is no reset button.
So BD if I mean so much to you as you have said you will pull your nose in, if not I can not wait till our date as I will rub your nose in what you can not have. It is my job to know people I have portfolio's coming out my ears no not think I have nothing on you as I do and I will use it to my advantage to make you see what you can not have.
After my last post of BD being out of reach many things in a short amount of time chanced, Within 24 hours we had decided to go out on a date, the only time both of our agendas are free is early December. He again confessed his love his deepest feelings and desires towards me.
In this short change of things I have also found out he is an arrogant person which has made me a little upset, BD has taken credit for things that has had nothing to do with him. If it is one thing that really gets on my nerve it is people taking credit for others work, just because they are attention seekers and want a pat on the back for a job well done but to lazy to actually do the work! Needless to say I want to impregnate my stiletto up his anal canal.
My plan is to sit back and watch how things develop, see what steps he takes next. You see I am a person who can just wipe someone from my life without a second thought no matter who they are or how much I love them, For example my own mother, 13 years ago I wiped her from my life and I have no problems with it at all. I give people the benefit of the doubt but if one abuses trust over and over again it is "game over" and there is no reset button.
So BD if I mean so much to you as you have said you will pull your nose in, if not I can not wait till our date as I will rub your nose in what you can not have. It is my job to know people I have portfolio's coming out my ears no not think I have nothing on you as I do and I will use it to my advantage to make you see what you can not have.
Saturday 24 November 2007
Out of reach
Sometimes in life there are things you just know, without a doubt 100% rock solid "KNOW".
BD is something I know I want, The minute I seen him there was fireworks, It is the only way I can explain it and that is only because I see it on TV, the feeling I had was unexplainable and it still is.
Last night was a late night, 02:30 listening to music with BD, many tears shed and smiles broke, am emotional roller coaster that come to a screeching halt when one thing was misunderstood from some days ago and believe it or not it was about stiletto's.
I am a lady and I exude femininity I love being a female, I turn heads and give whiplash due to double takes, I am far from being on the cover of vogue, though I would not want that for me it is not my calling in life.
I am a caring person, a lover, I give all to the person I am with (with one exception) I would drop everything to be with BD, my whole world could stop, I would turn the world on its head, get every star from the sky just to be in his arms.
The energy exchanged when we talk or see each other is so powerful there has to be something in between us to block the intensity. We both want each other but there is something holding us back, maybe we are scared of it, maybe it is because it can be so perfect.
I have come to face the facts I can not have him. We are always making rules/excuses not to be with each other, He is not ready he is out of a relationship months ago and likes his alone time, A neutral rule we made I shall not share it with you, though it is a goal We/I will never be able to reach, not within the next year or more.
I believe BD deserves the best, to treat him well, to love, protect and honour him, to treat him the way he deserves, nothing but being number one in someones world, I know I can give him this.
We say we are perfect for each other though we always hold back and deep down know we will never be together.
What do I hear you say? Never say never? Time will tell but this is something so close yet so far out of reach.
BD is something I know I want, The minute I seen him there was fireworks, It is the only way I can explain it and that is only because I see it on TV, the feeling I had was unexplainable and it still is.
Last night was a late night, 02:30 listening to music with BD, many tears shed and smiles broke, am emotional roller coaster that come to a screeching halt when one thing was misunderstood from some days ago and believe it or not it was about stiletto's.
I am a lady and I exude femininity I love being a female, I turn heads and give whiplash due to double takes, I am far from being on the cover of vogue, though I would not want that for me it is not my calling in life.
I am a caring person, a lover, I give all to the person I am with (with one exception) I would drop everything to be with BD, my whole world could stop, I would turn the world on its head, get every star from the sky just to be in his arms.
The energy exchanged when we talk or see each other is so powerful there has to be something in between us to block the intensity. We both want each other but there is something holding us back, maybe we are scared of it, maybe it is because it can be so perfect.
I have come to face the facts I can not have him. We are always making rules/excuses not to be with each other, He is not ready he is out of a relationship months ago and likes his alone time, A neutral rule we made I shall not share it with you, though it is a goal We/I will never be able to reach, not within the next year or more.
I believe BD deserves the best, to treat him well, to love, protect and honour him, to treat him the way he deserves, nothing but being number one in someones world, I know I can give him this.
We say we are perfect for each other though we always hold back and deep down know we will never be together.
What do I hear you say? Never say never? Time will tell but this is something so close yet so far out of reach.
Tuesday 20 November 2007
The Menu
As arranged I was picked up for breakfast this morning, in his black pin stripped suit as I asked, he is taking my breath away with how he thinks and acts it amazes me someone pays such attention to detail and punctuality (though there is a contradiction coming up)
RR was a little nervous as he is forgetting to be a gentleman sometimes though I must say I was also nervous and I am unsure why. We went for a drink and food, they had totally nothing on the menu I could eat so I settled for a tomato juice, The talking was just to pass time I love learning about him even if I do all the babbling, Sometimes I just need to slap myself to shut up I must bore the pants off him, I do not care he knows who is in charge and is the boss and it is not him!
We went driving and got a few questions out in the open I offered him free range to ask me whatever he wanted and I would give direct nothing held back honest answers, he went for some mild questions ~grins~ you men just need to be blunt and stop beating around the bush. With my questions I went straight for the jugular and loved seeing him squirm in is lovely red leather seats!
There is a click between us that actually worries me a little that I shall sit on and think about as I am unsure why it worries/scares me.
I am in your mind RR, you know I am and I plan on staying there and having you for my personal little toy boy.
We need a night or weekend away you need to arrange it with the g/f, yes little boy you have a "business" trip coming up very soon and it is with me and it is some business that needs some serious attention!
RR was a little nervous as he is forgetting to be a gentleman sometimes though I must say I was also nervous and I am unsure why. We went for a drink and food, they had totally nothing on the menu I could eat so I settled for a tomato juice, The talking was just to pass time I love learning about him even if I do all the babbling, Sometimes I just need to slap myself to shut up I must bore the pants off him, I do not care he knows who is in charge and is the boss and it is not him!
We went driving and got a few questions out in the open I offered him free range to ask me whatever he wanted and I would give direct nothing held back honest answers, he went for some mild questions ~grins~ you men just need to be blunt and stop beating around the bush. With my questions I went straight for the jugular and loved seeing him squirm in is lovely red leather seats!
There is a click between us that actually worries me a little that I shall sit on and think about as I am unsure why it worries/scares me.
I am in your mind RR, you know I am and I plan on staying there and having you for my personal little toy boy.
We need a night or weekend away you need to arrange it with the g/f, yes little boy you have a "business" trip coming up very soon and it is with me and it is some business that needs some serious attention!
Monday 19 November 2007
Free Agenda
I have cleared my agenda for the week, I need a rest, to much work and no play makes Veiled boring! I went to the gym to work out and then relax in the sauna but I did make one appointment today.
16:30 I finished my appointment and went to one more interesting! The person I spent most of Saturday online and on the phone with I met tonight, it was lovely, though he did turn up late!
He had also just left a meeting and was in grey pin stripped suit which instantly worked for me!
We sat and talked for a while, the look in his eyes made me want to devour him.
He had to take something to a work colleague so we went driving, stepping into his car just added to me wanting to devour him, leather interior, the smell of leather seems to do something to me and he noticed!
The night was delightful and he is a very nice person even if we did not get to having a drink though that will be solved tomorrow when we have breakfast together, it would be him making me breakfast in bed but my house is in the middle of improvements, maybe next time.
RR I look forward to my breakfast, if your not careful you will be on the menu.
16:30 I finished my appointment and went to one more interesting! The person I spent most of Saturday online and on the phone with I met tonight, it was lovely, though he did turn up late!
He had also just left a meeting and was in grey pin stripped suit which instantly worked for me!
We sat and talked for a while, the look in his eyes made me want to devour him.
He had to take something to a work colleague so we went driving, stepping into his car just added to me wanting to devour him, leather interior, the smell of leather seems to do something to me and he noticed!
The night was delightful and he is a very nice person even if we did not get to having a drink though that will be solved tomorrow when we have breakfast together, it would be him making me breakfast in bed but my house is in the middle of improvements, maybe next time.
RR I look forward to my breakfast, if your not careful you will be on the menu.
Sunday 18 November 2007
Quiet weekend.
It has been a nice quiet weekend ~touch wood~ I hope my statement is not to premature seeing it is not even midday.
My weekends are usually quiet due to the fact that the boys are with their partners.
I enjoy my quiet weekends even if I have some paperwork to do it is quiet, relaxing and the telephone is nice and quiet.
Yesterday was interesting, I meet a sweet person online, I do not have time or chat often online so it was a nice surprise, after a few hours chatting online I gave him my number and he called me as I was going out for a nice walk in the winter air.
I was out for a while in the lovely weather, the sun was shinning though it was close to freezing point it was very nice to be out. The whole time while out I was on the telephone.
RR is handsome, tall, blond hair, blue eyes and you guessed it he is in a relationship. I learnt that later on, his girlfriend was at work that is why he was online.
Like I said he is very sweet, also very handsome, lets see how/what develops
My weekends are usually quiet due to the fact that the boys are with their partners.
I enjoy my quiet weekends even if I have some paperwork to do it is quiet, relaxing and the telephone is nice and quiet.
Yesterday was interesting, I meet a sweet person online, I do not have time or chat often online so it was a nice surprise, after a few hours chatting online I gave him my number and he called me as I was going out for a nice walk in the winter air.
I was out for a while in the lovely weather, the sun was shinning though it was close to freezing point it was very nice to be out. The whole time while out I was on the telephone.
RR is handsome, tall, blond hair, blue eyes and you guessed it he is in a relationship. I learnt that later on, his girlfriend was at work that is why he was online.
Like I said he is very sweet, also very handsome, lets see how/what develops
Friday 16 November 2007
So Early so eventful
I got my 07:30 wake up call from KE we had the usual talk and he made me smile, he hung up the phone when he was at the office and said he would call me later in the day before he heads off to the Canary Islands for a vacation with his wife, You see he is working on the marriage, Can't you see he is working on it? when he is calling me and begging me to be with him always?
A text arrived on my phone at 08:30 whilst I was in the shower, It was a distress call I presume as JP was caught last night from his girlfriend and had a lot of explaining to do, this is how I have heard it happened.
He got home at 22:00 the g/f was not home but had made dinner for herself and left, he was left to make a sandwich for himself. This frustrates me greatly, it really gets on my nerves when a female does not look after her man well and is self centered like this female! He was also frustrated and said to me he was hanging up the phone to make a sandwich then crawl into bed.
I sent him a text not even one minute later saying I worry about him as his tone of voice implied something was upsetting him, little did I know that some seconds earlier the g/f arrived home hours early and asked to use his phone. She used JP's phone and read his text message from me which put him in some boiling water as I can imagine.
Well apparently I am now Irish, I do not know how but it is something that saved his bacon I guess and I am now expecting an email from him when he has, in his words "Sat down and thought about everything and what he wants"
We all know how this ends right? Better the devil you know. A man never leaves the wife or g/f for the Mistress and anyways who said I would want that anyways, Even if I have deep feelings for the person.
I sit and I wait to see the outcome of it all what an eventful morning already and it is just over 09:00
A text arrived on my phone at 08:30 whilst I was in the shower, It was a distress call I presume as JP was caught last night from his girlfriend and had a lot of explaining to do, this is how I have heard it happened.
He got home at 22:00 the g/f was not home but had made dinner for herself and left, he was left to make a sandwich for himself. This frustrates me greatly, it really gets on my nerves when a female does not look after her man well and is self centered like this female! He was also frustrated and said to me he was hanging up the phone to make a sandwich then crawl into bed.
I sent him a text not even one minute later saying I worry about him as his tone of voice implied something was upsetting him, little did I know that some seconds earlier the g/f arrived home hours early and asked to use his phone. She used JP's phone and read his text message from me which put him in some boiling water as I can imagine.
Well apparently I am now Irish, I do not know how but it is something that saved his bacon I guess and I am now expecting an email from him when he has, in his words "Sat down and thought about everything and what he wants"
We all know how this ends right? Better the devil you know. A man never leaves the wife or g/f for the Mistress and anyways who said I would want that anyways, Even if I have deep feelings for the person.
I sit and I wait to see the outcome of it all what an eventful morning already and it is just over 09:00
Thursday 15 November 2007
Compact is better.
Today I was in the south of the country attending to some work and meetings, I knew this yesterday so I contacted my ex (mentioned in the last entry) and informed him I wanted a few of my things back that I needed, I had no intentions to be staying long at his house or to have any kind of chat as it was going to be between meetings and it was a two hour drive from meeting to meeting.
While arriving in front of his house I seen his mother head for the stairs faster then any lightening I had ever seen, it was quiet amusing actually, I got out of the car, placed my jacket on and headed for the front door, he was there waiting as soon as I seen him I just about threw up. What did I ever see in this person? He looked very unwell and also seems he is not taking care of himself in more ways then one, he utterly smelt!
I went inside for some minutes and laughed internally when his mother showered her face and she had to pick up her jaw off the ground when seeing me, which was exactly the same her son had to do when he opened the door.
Let me explain, The last time I seen him which was only a few weeks ago (The beginning of September) I was a lot bigger and also not in the state of mind to take total care of myself, meaning cloths and make-up, My self confidence has sky rocketed and everyone has noticed it, I have also lost a huge amount of weight, three dress sizes to be exact.
I had a tea got my things and left, this was not before I turned on my selective hearing because he was driving my insane with remarks on how stunning I was looking and why he ever treated me so bad, Well guess what little boy ? look drool and dream as this you will never have! Never Again yes I dare to say Never!
Heading off to the next meeting I was about to die of hunger so I stopped and tanked the car and got a nice healthy sandwich, When I was paying someone tapped me on the shoulder and said "Hi gorgeous" I turned with a smile as I knew the voice, out of all the people in the world it was the person I was racing to for the meeting, we decided to take the next exit of the highway as we both knew a nice place for a drink and something to eat and we would take care of business there.
Arriving at the cafe he stepped out of his car and was in fits of laughter, I looked at him and asked what was so funny? I looked at my shoes, top, dress pants, everything was in order. I was getting frustrated with his laughter he now had tears rolling down his face. We were escorted to a table, my jacket was taken from me and we were seated, thank goodness he has stopped laughing and pulled himself together then he asked me
Business-man "Why do you drive such a car?"
Me "Why not such a car?"
BM " Well you know being in the position your in and all"
Me " Yes and?"
BM " Don't you think it will set a better impression is you had a more upper class car?"
Me " No, as people hire me for my brain not my car"
BM " True but if you roll up in such a compact car it, well it looks strange"
Me " So you mean if I had a car like yours a brand new BMW with all options it makes me look smarter and better at my work?
BM " Well no it does not mean that, it just means your more successful"
Me " No I think it just shower having my smaller car I do not have to compare my dick size to yours"
~ grinning as I open my folder of papers and seeing him with his mouth opened catching flies then I added with a smile "Now shall we talk about the conference coming up?
What was more entertaining about this conversation was the fact he was talking in a rather loud voice and the people behind us and to our side also heard the conversation, all happening to be businessmen also, they all put their heads down and go back to their laptops and paperwork after my comment.
Looking outside into the car park it was full of all these new flashy BMW's , Mercedes, Audi's and so on, these in between all the optional extra cars was my little shinning compact car, yes it is a this years model, yes it gets me from point A to point B and no I have nothing to prove and no penis to compare to yours. I am a Business Woman I am good at what I do and if I turned up on my bicycle it does not make me any better or worse at my job!
While arriving in front of his house I seen his mother head for the stairs faster then any lightening I had ever seen, it was quiet amusing actually, I got out of the car, placed my jacket on and headed for the front door, he was there waiting as soon as I seen him I just about threw up. What did I ever see in this person? He looked very unwell and also seems he is not taking care of himself in more ways then one, he utterly smelt!
I went inside for some minutes and laughed internally when his mother showered her face and she had to pick up her jaw off the ground when seeing me, which was exactly the same her son had to do when he opened the door.
Let me explain, The last time I seen him which was only a few weeks ago (The beginning of September) I was a lot bigger and also not in the state of mind to take total care of myself, meaning cloths and make-up, My self confidence has sky rocketed and everyone has noticed it, I have also lost a huge amount of weight, three dress sizes to be exact.
I had a tea got my things and left, this was not before I turned on my selective hearing because he was driving my insane with remarks on how stunning I was looking and why he ever treated me so bad, Well guess what little boy ? look drool and dream as this you will never have! Never Again yes I dare to say Never!
Heading off to the next meeting I was about to die of hunger so I stopped and tanked the car and got a nice healthy sandwich, When I was paying someone tapped me on the shoulder and said "Hi gorgeous" I turned with a smile as I knew the voice, out of all the people in the world it was the person I was racing to for the meeting, we decided to take the next exit of the highway as we both knew a nice place for a drink and something to eat and we would take care of business there.
Arriving at the cafe he stepped out of his car and was in fits of laughter, I looked at him and asked what was so funny? I looked at my shoes, top, dress pants, everything was in order. I was getting frustrated with his laughter he now had tears rolling down his face. We were escorted to a table, my jacket was taken from me and we were seated, thank goodness he has stopped laughing and pulled himself together then he asked me
Business-man "Why do you drive such a car?"
Me "Why not such a car?"
BM " Well you know being in the position your in and all"
Me " Yes and?"
BM " Don't you think it will set a better impression is you had a more upper class car?"
Me " No, as people hire me for my brain not my car"
BM " True but if you roll up in such a compact car it, well it looks strange"
Me " So you mean if I had a car like yours a brand new BMW with all options it makes me look smarter and better at my work?
BM " Well no it does not mean that, it just means your more successful"
Me " No I think it just shower having my smaller car I do not have to compare my dick size to yours"
~ grinning as I open my folder of papers and seeing him with his mouth opened catching flies then I added with a smile "Now shall we talk about the conference coming up?
What was more entertaining about this conversation was the fact he was talking in a rather loud voice and the people behind us and to our side also heard the conversation, all happening to be businessmen also, they all put their heads down and go back to their laptops and paperwork after my comment.
Looking outside into the car park it was full of all these new flashy BMW's , Mercedes, Audi's and so on, these in between all the optional extra cars was my little shinning compact car, yes it is a this years model, yes it gets me from point A to point B and no I have nothing to prove and no penis to compare to yours. I am a Business Woman I am good at what I do and if I turned up on my bicycle it does not make me any better or worse at my job!
Wednesday 14 November 2007
A little of the past
I had a lover for two years, he was younger then me, five years to be exact, no one could tell me there was something wrong with him, I would not hear it as he was perfect, young and handsome he was a real prince riding the white horse. When he hugged me the whole world stood still, nothing could harm me when I was in his arms, he lived with my boyfriend and I, my boyfriend was unaware of our relationship.
It all come to a crushing stop when I found out he was cheating on me, I hear you ask how is that possible when I was actually cheating, well this is how I see it, I was nothing but honest to him about everything, nothing hidden, if I was hiding something it was from my boyfriend not my lover and I expected the same back from him.
I was actually in love with this person and I gave him chance after chance but I found out he is a compulsive liar, I was weak, very weak with him but it will be no more.
For his birthday which I was invited to I stayed no longer then five minutes, I entered the house that he now shared with his mother, yes he is a real mummy boy, thirty something and living with mum because she cries "I need you", I entered, gave him the things I had left at my house that was from him, slapped his face very hard and walked out.
Explain that to mum little boy, How you are a cheater like she is, how you lied over and over and played with peoples feelings, not only mine but the six others you were playing with, I am just lucky I am a smart female and remember not to trust males and always use protection, never forget anything in the heat of the moment, I just wonder how many females out there now have the sexually transmitted diseases you have?
I may be your ex and you are mine but that does not mean I am out of the loop about you foolish boy, all your lovers and ex lovers know who I am and are not scared to ask me anything, have you not noticed how your little black book is that, little and getting smaller by the day, like your cock, oh yes just to clear the air of a lie I told, you never made me cum I always faked it.
It all come to a crushing stop when I found out he was cheating on me, I hear you ask how is that possible when I was actually cheating, well this is how I see it, I was nothing but honest to him about everything, nothing hidden, if I was hiding something it was from my boyfriend not my lover and I expected the same back from him.
I was actually in love with this person and I gave him chance after chance but I found out he is a compulsive liar, I was weak, very weak with him but it will be no more.
For his birthday which I was invited to I stayed no longer then five minutes, I entered the house that he now shared with his mother, yes he is a real mummy boy, thirty something and living with mum because she cries "I need you", I entered, gave him the things I had left at my house that was from him, slapped his face very hard and walked out.
Explain that to mum little boy, How you are a cheater like she is, how you lied over and over and played with peoples feelings, not only mine but the six others you were playing with, I am just lucky I am a smart female and remember not to trust males and always use protection, never forget anything in the heat of the moment, I just wonder how many females out there now have the sexually transmitted diseases you have?
I may be your ex and you are mine but that does not mean I am out of the loop about you foolish boy, all your lovers and ex lovers know who I am and are not scared to ask me anything, have you not noticed how your little black book is that, little and getting smaller by the day, like your cock, oh yes just to clear the air of a lie I told, you never made me cum I always faked it.
Tuesday 13 November 2007
Wake up
After going to bed at 01:00 which is a usual time for me, I had all my paperwork done so I can have my day free tomorrow now being today to sleep in and dream all morning.
No such luck, the boyfriends alarm woke me at 05:45, he always sleeps through his alarm so I shook him awake, kicked him out of bed and into the shower then I went back to sleep only to be woken again by him slapping me on the arse telling me how good my arse is looking from all the working out I have been doing, needless to say he got bombarded with a delightful ray of my colourful vocabulary. That was it, I could not sleep anymore, I settled back into bed looking at the ceiling wondering what to do today.
he is not allowed to hang up the phone because this guy at the door looked like he was just released from prison. I got a text from JP at 07:00 asking if I was awake, I replied so then he called me, we had a little chinwag and I devoured him with my thoughts of our next meeting, he was lucky to be in a traffic jam at the time as he informed me he was unable to get out of the car due to his suit pants being on the edge of exploding open. He put me on hold three times because of the girlfriend calling and complaining her Internet connection kept dropping out. I have seen this girls picture and she is blond for a reason, she even admits she is demanding and high maintenance, also a sandwich short of a picnic.
The conversation ended when he arrived at work and I proceeded to make a tea, then without fail KE called on the way to the office with regular "blah blah blah" while on the phone to him the doorbell went and it shocked me, what was someone doing at my door at 08:15? It was the electrician I forgot they were coming today to change the meters, I informed KE he was not allowed to hang up the telephone at all as this person at my door looked like he had just escaped from prison, the vibes I got from this person were not warm fuzzy feelings at all!. KE kept on the phone as long as he could though he had to hang up when he left for a meeting and I was left with a monkeys arse ugly little perv who looked either Turkish or from India, either way I was not impressed with this little midgets passes at me.
He was here to change the meters yet all he done was try and touch me, this little worm was even walking around inviting himself to make dinner for me, trying to get close to me and hug me with an erection that was trying to rip out of his already skin tight pants. I was disgusted and felt rather violated, When he left he informed me that he has my number and knows where I live, we will see about that little boy there is no chance you will be putting that knowledge to any use! On a final note, your 5'1 arse will be reported to your company!
No such luck, the boyfriends alarm woke me at 05:45, he always sleeps through his alarm so I shook him awake, kicked him out of bed and into the shower then I went back to sleep only to be woken again by him slapping me on the arse telling me how good my arse is looking from all the working out I have been doing, needless to say he got bombarded with a delightful ray of my colourful vocabulary. That was it, I could not sleep anymore, I settled back into bed looking at the ceiling wondering what to do today.
he is not allowed to hang up the phone because this guy at the door looked like he was just released from prison. I got a text from JP at 07:00 asking if I was awake, I replied so then he called me, we had a little chinwag and I devoured him with my thoughts of our next meeting, he was lucky to be in a traffic jam at the time as he informed me he was unable to get out of the car due to his suit pants being on the edge of exploding open. He put me on hold three times because of the girlfriend calling and complaining her Internet connection kept dropping out. I have seen this girls picture and she is blond for a reason, she even admits she is demanding and high maintenance, also a sandwich short of a picnic.
The conversation ended when he arrived at work and I proceeded to make a tea, then without fail KE called on the way to the office with regular "blah blah blah" while on the phone to him the doorbell went and it shocked me, what was someone doing at my door at 08:15? It was the electrician I forgot they were coming today to change the meters, I informed KE he was not allowed to hang up the telephone at all as this person at my door looked like he had just escaped from prison, the vibes I got from this person were not warm fuzzy feelings at all!. KE kept on the phone as long as he could though he had to hang up when he left for a meeting and I was left with a monkeys arse ugly little perv who looked either Turkish or from India, either way I was not impressed with this little midgets passes at me.
He was here to change the meters yet all he done was try and touch me, this little worm was even walking around inviting himself to make dinner for me, trying to get close to me and hug me with an erection that was trying to rip out of his already skin tight pants. I was disgusted and felt rather violated, When he left he informed me that he has my number and knows where I live, we will see about that little boy there is no chance you will be putting that knowledge to any use! On a final note, your 5'1 arse will be reported to your company!
Monday 12 November 2007
Right on time!
It is 17:00 and my phone starts ringing every week day at this time.
There are three males who call me on a regular basis, JP calls on his way home to his girlfriend, KE calls in the morning on the way to the office after kissing his wife goodbye, also on the way home from the office before he greets his wife, PH he calls often also for hours, he is single.
Today JP called right on 17:00, He always makes me smile, we chatted about the regular things like work and how the weekend was, I should know by now not to ask about that he will always whine down the telephone to me about the girlfriend and how he needs me and wants to be with me. ~yawns~
JP was begging to see me this week, though this week our agendas do not match, he is out of the country two times this week and I am also, I shall not lose any sleep over it, He is the one stressing out over when he can get away from his always complaining girlfriend.
While on the phone I heard it beep and it was KE calling, it seems he was not impressed I was not answering his call, he left two voice mails and three texts messages. My phone beeped again it was PH, he left a little text that made me smile and I answered him as soon as I was off the phone.
I do enjoy my little calls from the boys as long as they do not whine so much. I know what to buy them for Christmas, some cheese for their whine, then again I can't as their partners might ask questions.
Boys just know this, be as demanding as you like, I live my life my way and in no way shape or form does it revolve around you.
There are three males who call me on a regular basis, JP calls on his way home to his girlfriend, KE calls in the morning on the way to the office after kissing his wife goodbye, also on the way home from the office before he greets his wife, PH he calls often also for hours, he is single.
Today JP called right on 17:00, He always makes me smile, we chatted about the regular things like work and how the weekend was, I should know by now not to ask about that he will always whine down the telephone to me about the girlfriend and how he needs me and wants to be with me. ~yawns~
JP was begging to see me this week, though this week our agendas do not match, he is out of the country two times this week and I am also, I shall not lose any sleep over it, He is the one stressing out over when he can get away from his always complaining girlfriend.
While on the phone I heard it beep and it was KE calling, it seems he was not impressed I was not answering his call, he left two voice mails and three texts messages. My phone beeped again it was PH, he left a little text that made me smile and I answered him as soon as I was off the phone.
I do enjoy my little calls from the boys as long as they do not whine so much. I know what to buy them for Christmas, some cheese for their whine, then again I can't as their partners might ask questions.
Boys just know this, be as demanding as you like, I live my life my way and in no way shape or form does it revolve around you.
Wednesday 7 November 2007
I bis you bis
I had a day off yesterday it was well deserved though I had an appointment in the afternoon, Should I say evening ~huge grin~
I have been dating this guy (lets call him JP) JP is handsome, successful and also involved, He is ever so delightful to be with.
JP landed at the airport at 22:00 and I informed him I shall leave my house and drive in the direction of the airport, when he landed he was to call me. As I was driving towards him I seen a lovely looking hotel "The Ibis" I stopped and booked a room for the night. Here I have to make something clear JP had told his partner he was flying onto the next place of business and getting a hotel there, little did she know he was only 30 minutes from her and not in the country he said he was.
JP called and I told him where I was, he arrived shortly after, He look very handsome. I love a man in a suit and if it is pin stripped oh how I will devour him.
We checked in and he was a little frustrated due to the looks I was getting, Arriving at the room he commented on my clothing, as he should I looked stunning in my black skirt and stockings accompanied with stilettos and a delightful blouse.
It was not long before I ordered him to take his top off and be ready for a massage, he was totally relaxed in minutes then play time was over, I got him naked.
He had (yes had) never cheated on his girlfriend but you see there is something about me you do not know, not only am I Dominant in work, I am also in the bedroom, nothing feels more natural then a whip in my hands!
JP being only a beginner to the BDSM things I was rather light on him which is more then he deserved, Some CBT (cock ball torture) much nipple torture along with tickling and the most lovely of all, pressure point pain. I mix pain with pleasure so he was taken care of with stimulating his sense's, feeding him things he has never had before, touching him in places and ways he has only dreamt of, the night turned into morning which turned into having intercourse, it was amazing after a dry spell of months, he is not a big boy by far but it felt like he took my virginity I was so tight. Once was not enough for me and due to the fact he told me his recovery time was very long I had a point to prove, I can say to you honestly and knowing it first hand his recovery time is short.
Departing from the hotel at 09:30 was bitter sweet, little does JP know I actually have deep feelings for him though I did get a night with him and desires were met. We both left the hotel with a hug, kiss and wink and him with a guilty feeling, racing off out of the car park was the last I seen of him that day though not the last I heard from him, he contacts me daily.
That day we were both late for our morning meetings and appointments not that we cared seeing the high we were both on.
I have been dating this guy (lets call him JP) JP is handsome, successful and also involved, He is ever so delightful to be with.
JP landed at the airport at 22:00 and I informed him I shall leave my house and drive in the direction of the airport, when he landed he was to call me. As I was driving towards him I seen a lovely looking hotel "The Ibis" I stopped and booked a room for the night. Here I have to make something clear JP had told his partner he was flying onto the next place of business and getting a hotel there, little did she know he was only 30 minutes from her and not in the country he said he was.
JP called and I told him where I was, he arrived shortly after, He look very handsome. I love a man in a suit and if it is pin stripped oh how I will devour him.
We checked in and he was a little frustrated due to the looks I was getting, Arriving at the room he commented on my clothing, as he should I looked stunning in my black skirt and stockings accompanied with stilettos and a delightful blouse.
It was not long before I ordered him to take his top off and be ready for a massage, he was totally relaxed in minutes then play time was over, I got him naked.
He had (yes had) never cheated on his girlfriend but you see there is something about me you do not know, not only am I Dominant in work, I am also in the bedroom, nothing feels more natural then a whip in my hands!
JP being only a beginner to the BDSM things I was rather light on him which is more then he deserved, Some CBT (cock ball torture) much nipple torture along with tickling and the most lovely of all, pressure point pain. I mix pain with pleasure so he was taken care of with stimulating his sense's, feeding him things he has never had before, touching him in places and ways he has only dreamt of, the night turned into morning which turned into having intercourse, it was amazing after a dry spell of months, he is not a big boy by far but it felt like he took my virginity I was so tight. Once was not enough for me and due to the fact he told me his recovery time was very long I had a point to prove, I can say to you honestly and knowing it first hand his recovery time is short.
Departing from the hotel at 09:30 was bitter sweet, little does JP know I actually have deep feelings for him though I did get a night with him and desires were met. We both left the hotel with a hug, kiss and wink and him with a guilty feeling, racing off out of the car park was the last I seen of him that day though not the last I heard from him, he contacts me daily.
That day we were both late for our morning meetings and appointments not that we cared seeing the high we were both on.
Thursday 1 November 2007
Who is Veiled Secrets
Hello and welcome to my blog, My name is Veiled, Veiled Secrets,
To the outside world I am a caring loving person. I take good care of my boyfriend and people around me, My family and friends mean the world to me.
There are only three people in this world who know about my veiled secrets.
One, Is my father who I love and respect highly, He is the reason I am as successful as I am. Always a respectful man never a cheater, that I have learnt from my mother.
Two, A friends I have met online, She lives close to me we talk often over a glass of wine sharing stories and desires that not many could understand.
Three, My best friend in the world, she loves be for who I am and tolerates me ~kisses to you~
This blog will tell about my Veiled Secrets, My day to day secrets which usually involve, work, travel, kinkiness, teasing and men.
If I was a male I would be called a hero though I am not male and I am not a hero, I am me. Maybe you label me different, That's is your right, I have my point of view and you are allowed yours.
To the outside world I am a caring loving person. I take good care of my boyfriend and people around me, My family and friends mean the world to me.
There are only three people in this world who know about my veiled secrets.
One, Is my father who I love and respect highly, He is the reason I am as successful as I am. Always a respectful man never a cheater, that I have learnt from my mother.
Two, A friends I have met online, She lives close to me we talk often over a glass of wine sharing stories and desires that not many could understand.
Three, My best friend in the world, she loves be for who I am and tolerates me ~kisses to you~
This blog will tell about my Veiled Secrets, My day to day secrets which usually involve, work, travel, kinkiness, teasing and men.
If I was a male I would be called a hero though I am not male and I am not a hero, I am me. Maybe you label me different, That's is your right, I have my point of view and you are allowed yours.
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