Help needed!

Recently I do not know if I have been busy or just not interested in "things." All my times has been is work, stressing and the gym to get the stress out, I have not even had the mindset to flirt, to mess up some minds which is really not like me. If I look deep down I know the reason why, actually it is not even deep down it is right here! sitting on top of my heart and I shall share it with you.
A good friend of mine, also a female working in a mans world. I have businessmen to deal with, she has scientist and professors to deal with, at least if needed I can walk all over the males I know, I can only imagine what she has to get through to control them, though being very feminine females we do have our ways!
Last week my friend was away for the week in a conference, dealing with the long days, the drinks and the males, I was free a lot of the week sitting at home pining over someone and it seems she was also. You see my friend and I have pretty much given up on finding "the one" who makes our hearts skip a beat, who make us feel like the princess's we are. We have our little "side kicks" though nothing concrete as it means we might have to let down our defensive walls and trust people, both being hurt before we are not planning on doing that journey anytime soon.
My days were filled with my heart having an irregular beat, my thoughts all up in the air unable to think straight, it was a lucky thing I didn't have to work, I even checked my email so often, not that it made email turn up any faster. This is why, BB, that is who it is all about BB, he was away in Paris, the city of love and he did not know he had my love, he did not know he has this affect on me, why didn't I tell him? why didn't I come up with an excuse to go also? Good heavens what is happening to me ?
I think it is something in the air, during the meetings my friend was in she had times to message me and she has also lost her head, it seems Mr P has given her the bug as well, she can not focus she is pulling her lovely hair out! we both are.
The advantage I have over my friend is that I have spent a lovely, relaxing afternoon with BB and she has not had that chance with Mr P at the moment.
Now I get to let out a few things. BB it just amazing, he makes me lose my head, I can not get him out of my head, he is a gentleman, within the few hours we were together I felt so amazing he put me at ease yet lifted me on a pedestal, I have never felt so complete, he makes me feel like a giggling little school girl and to put the cherry on top he wears a suit most times and is a great kisser!
I have really lost myself and I am finding it so hard to keep my defenses up, I am slowly letting the drawbridge down and that is all new to me and I do not know what I am meant to do now, how am I meant to act? how do I keep protecting myself if I am letting someone slowly chip away at the brick wall? I am a giver, a care taker but I never let anyone get to close not ever.
I guess I need to sit back and try to relax as much as I can, maybe it is time I made it to the gym everyday to get all this frustration out that BB is not in my arms everyday, goodness me I even "half" joked at marriage today and he did also! this is crazy, insane I have lost my head! totally lost my head! As my friend said "We have lost the only braincell that worked and rationalized things" we are both in the same boat going up the same river we just hope there is no waterfall ahead that we fall down!